Thinking about what I am doing

Today started like any other day. I got up to go run and only after I was dressed and heading out the door did I look at the current temperature that said it was 13 degrees with a wind chill of less than 0. Too cold for this runner. I went back to bed. Within an hour of my day at work, a co-worker comes in to my office and asks for two minutes of advice. She seemed rather perplexed so I gave her my full attention (and probably more than 2 minutes). She asks me how she can stay motivated when her running routine (preparing for a half-marathon) has had some “wrinkles” in it and she is thinking that she will not be prepared for it. She tells me she very methodically looks at the regime and where she should be and does not feel that she is there. I tell her two things – one, she needs to stop thinking so much as she has become preoccupied with her goal of not walking at all and two, she needs to forgive herself. We chat a little bit longer and I give her a hug and send her on her way. A little bit later, she sends me an email asking me if since that kid lost his self-control a couple of weeks ago, if I had thought twice about what I was doing. I first told her that my answer might have been different if I had gotten hurt, but also acknowledged that we take chances and that I was not going to live my life in fear of the unknown. I had done more living in the last year with trying new things, conquering fears long-buried, and being hurt by a dear friend. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I was inquisitive, so I asked her what she meant. She mentions that perhaps I should give advice to others and get paid for it. She jokingly tells me to send her the bill. What do you guys think? I am really trying to listen to my heart and let it guide me. For too long, my mind has been leading the way and it has not been fulfilling. Over the last year, my heart has led and I finally started living. I need to keep asking the questions…one day the answers will come.

Michelle Homme 2011 ©

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